Weeding...

I'm thinking of starting a second blog... Somewhere to write about my struggle to change my life for the better. My eldest sister said something to me recently. She encouraged me to take care to constantly keep to my weeding in my life. Just like a garden, if you neglect the weeding, the ugly weeds over take everything. You have to keep to the constant weeding. And I'm pretty sure I've let mine go for a long long time. Not only are there weeds and weeds, my garden has no clear boundaries either. It's a horrible mess. It's beginning to get a bit better and show progress, but it could easily go back to needing to be plowed over if I'm not careful. It's taken me to my thirties to realize that my family is majorly dysfunctional. And we all have taken bits and pieces of this dysfunction into our own little families and marriages. I don't want this for my family. I want my home to be a domestic church. I want happiness. I want to live a good life. I want to break the circle of the ugliness. I want peace. I want joy. I want better for my children. And it all starts with me changing myself, weeding, praying and learning how to be the wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend and person that I was supposed to be all along. Lucky for me that God is ever so patient.

I actually love to write. I was a creative writing major in college and it's something I just don't do anymore. I miss it. I think this is a chance to as they say "kill two birds with one stone." However, I do hate that saying. So violent. So I plan to write and write and hopefully it helps me to work through all of this and some how make sense of it on the other side. If only I could come up with a title for this second blog...

Updated Pics

Chilling at the pool, while Daddy and liitle man swim.

Ready for bed time.

Scary Night Last Night

Baby girl gave us a bit of a scare last night. At her first pediatrician appointment last Monday, her doctor confirmed for us that she has laryngotracheomalacia. While at the hospital the nurses had twice called down NICU nurses during the night due to her oxygen levels dropping. At the time we had thought it to be a fluke. She did have a bit of a drinking too fast problem and forgetting to breathe. Her doctor had just advised to try to slow her down during feedings and help her remember to take a break and breathe. But now it turns out she does have a little problem. The huge long word above. It's common in infants and we are told her case is mild. It should clear up by 6-12 months. Until then we just have to be careful and watch her, and listen to her by monitor when she sleeps, slow her down when she eats and try to keep her calm as best we can. Oh, and try to keep her healthy as best we can. That's great with Fall coming and her going to daycare! Colds galore! At least it's a church and there will only be 4 infants with her. All about the same age. Cool huh? But dang it still scares the crap out of me at times. Some times she really seems to struggle to breathe. Especially when she gets upset. Plus we are doing 100% formula now because my milk isn't producing enough and we really have make sure she eats enough too. The better she does at growing and thriving, the better her little problem will get. Last night was especially difficult with her breathing. She struggled the worse I've seen her struggle from 12-1 a.m. and I was home alone. I was so glad to see my husband come through the door at 1! It's amazing he has such a way of calming her when she's cranky! A truly beautiful father daughter relationship already starting! Please keep us in your prayers that this condition clears up sooner than later and that she has an easy flu and cold season this year. I so wish I could stay home with her...

Pure Sweetness, Well Mostly

So far he likes her most of the time! Except for yesterday when he couldn't understand why exactly she got to go to Target too. Surely she could just stay home by herself...

Welcome baby Megan

Rainy 4th of July Fun

One good thing about Jon & Kate + 8. Little man saw their 4th of July episode and wanted to make his own flag cake! He loves that show. He calls it the lots of babies show. It was a perfect rainy 4th of July activity!

Huge Swollen Prego Feet, Pizza & Pudding

So it's only three more days until baby! My feet and ankles are huge. I thought I'd treat you all to a lovely photo of them. Well, I did get my toes done, but that didn't help the prego feet look any better. Oh well. They are seriously huge!!!! Are you happy Beautiful Day? I finally posted the feet for you.

We did family pizza night last night! Little man loves family pizza night. Thanks Meant To Be for the great pizza crust recipe! It's still a family favorite for us. Little man loves to put the pepperoni on. We think he eats more than he puts on the pizza! We made last night a little extra special and went ahead and made pudding together too. I can't tell you how wonderful it is to have fun in the kitchen as a family! It's one of my favorite things! Simple cheap fun. And we always laugh tons.